Best Way to Develop a More Relaxed Lifestyle with the Right Attitude

An effective way to develop a more relaxed, calm, and peaceful lifestyle is to become aware of our attitudes and beliefs, and how these relate to the way we deal with stress and stressful events.

If we analyze our reactions, we will see that we don’t always act rationally. Often we act on well-established, but inappropriate, beliefs, for example, on an intellectual level we may know that if we make a mistake it is better to face up to it immediately, take responsibility, and deal with the consequences. People who avoid taking responsibility, who attempt to hide the problem or push the blame onto someone else, create situations fraught with feat, anxiety, and guilt that span days instead of an awkward half hour.

Recognizing the beliefs behind out actions is the first step in changing the way we behave. When faced with a potentially stressful situation, you should try to distance yourself from the event for a moment. Ask yourself what action you need to take to deal with the event effectively, and remain focused and relaxed. By accepting that we have a choice to be stressed or relaxed, we give ourselves the power to choose to remain calm.

There are a variety of techniques you can employ to change your attitudes, improve your ability to relax quickly and easily, and to remain calm, avoiding frequent stress.

Making choices

For many people the list of things they “must” or “should” do creates enough pressure to keep them constantly stressed. If you feel this applies to you, try a simple technique to reduce stress. Firstly, acknowledge you have choice in whether or not you will do something. This alone can relieve the feeling of being weighed down by demands made on you. Then try saying, “I choose to…” rather than “I must…” or say, “I want to…” rather than “I should…”

When you make a conscious choice to complete tasks, you become motivated to do so. This also includes learning to say “no” when you are asked to do something you feel is outside your responsibilities or which will place unreasonable demands on your time. Saying “yes” when you want to say “no” is likely to make you resentful and angry, and is unlikely to reduce your stress levels. If you generally say “yes” to any request, those around you may initially react to your refusals; however, if you keep calm and polite, they will gradually come to respect your redefined boundaries.

Visualization

A very simple and effective relaxation technique, visualization is, in simple terms, conscious day-dreaming. As you practice visualization, these daydreams will become mote vivid, and the time it takes you to achieve relaxation will become shorter.

Our imaginations are powerful tools. Just as we can work our bodies into a “fight or flight” response by thinking about a stressful incident, we can also create a state of deep relaxation by thinking about a calm and peaceful situation.

Visualization can counter negative thoughts, anxiety and nervousness. This process of creating scenarios in our minds, in which we react as we would like to react, can assist in building confidence to deal with challenges; it also provides alternative ways to cope with recurring events that we find stressful.